Wants and Needs

From the Lodge….Just celebrated my 86th. I don’t think I ever expected to live so long. I am not so sure at various time I wanted to live so long. (You know the old saying “don’t wish for something, because you may get it and find you really didn’t want it”. )

However when I add the good and subtract the not so good I am still way ahead in my life’s ledger.

It is said that the expectations we have for what we want out of life change about once every decade. We find the things we have to have and cannot live without fade into the past just as the night fades into morn and the morning fades into night. We complain when it seems we don’t get what we want but somehow we almost always get what we need.

At ten I wanted to run away from home and join a flying circus. Well, I did run away- five doors from home and hid in a fire station training tower while every neighbor was out looking for me. I insisted my brother go with me. We climbed to the top of the tower nine levels up. Might still be there but my brother chickened out and started yelling at our searchers. The jig was up, and we climbed nine levels down. Never tried that again. ( Lesson learned-the neighbors that helped search for you never let you forget what a stupid thing you did.)

In my second decade, at about the age of eleven, I went to the neighborhood picture show and the movie was Bolero, staring George Raft and Carole Lombard. I don’t think at such a tender age I understood what love was, I only knew I had it bad. My only desire was to meet George Raft and take him away from bimbos like Carole Lombard. I knew he loved horses so I invited him to the Kentucky Derby, I wrote him and gave him directions to my house and that I would be waiting for him at the corner of 18th and Garland where the streetcar stopped. I waited from nine in the morning until after dark, met every street car but to no avail; however, to this day I have a picture of him in my house. I stayed loyal to his memory but since he has been dead quite a while, I found I wanted a live fantasy. Sean Connery has filled the bill.

But during all this day dreaming I married the one who filled the Bill quite well for almost sixty years and I found out what love really was.

And so it is and was, our expectations are not always founded in logic or reason but more in what we think we have to have to be happy. If it were possible I would tell young people, never stop dreaming of what you want out of life, but remember your dreams should be in a place where they can be nurtured but not held accountable if they fail to come full circle and meet your expectations.

Take a few moments and realize how blessed you are with the life you have. Much you want is window dressing and will never replace that which you have worked for and accomplished.


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